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Incredibly Personal Secrets

Mon Mar 2, 2009, 2:17 PM
Doobie doobie doooooo.
Oh. Hello.
Didn't see you there.
I was just whistling a jaunty tune, while sipping some cola from a drinking cylinder, when the voice in my head told me it was time for a new journal. As usual, I complied with its wishes--mainly to avoid violence--and am now typing prudently to satisfy its evil whims.
...
So...hrm.
Oh. Here's some advice that I just deduced all by myself; It's better to draw on your drawing table than when you're sitting on your waterbed, with a soft covered sketchbook. Uh hyuck. Oh, and...if you tie your shoes just slightly tighter than usual, it makes you feel full of zazz. Like a ninja or an action hero of some sort, ready to leap into action at the slightest provocation.
It's sweet.
Try it, you'll see.

Also, my muse was reincarnated in the form of an especially cozy pair of longjohns, which have become my most prized possession. Did you ever play Morrowind, and enchant some pants to be magic? Well that's what my longjohns are like. They give me +3 to motivation rolls, as well as increasing my dexterity, charisma, and strength by 1! At this rate I'm gonna level up soon.
Fucking sweet, dude.

Now, I sleep.
If you read this, then sometime within the next thousand years one of your descendants will be born with antlers. You're welcome.

P.S. It occurs to me that 'read' and 'read' should be spelled differently, to avoid momentary 'tense' confusion. I'll write somebody about that and see what I can do.

  • Mood: Neutral
  • Listening to: Bill Maher talk about Snuggies
  • Reading: Fantastical Giraffe Porn
  • Watching: ATHF
  • Playing: Draw the picture
  • Eating: Doobie Smoke
  • Drinking: The Blood of a quadrillion Babies!

Devious Comments

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:iconinsanejudgement:
That is some awesome Advice, you know. I never would have figured that out.

Antlers? Awesome!

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:icondarkcrypt:
What the hell!
I thought I replied to this when I got it. :paranoid:
*Cough*
I know, right! Tight shoelaces rock.
And yes antlers *are* awesome. That's why us Canadians fashion our magical wands and certain lightsaber crystals from them. Plus they're good for pokin' people.
:iconinsanejudgement:
wait, does thismean in a thousand years, your family will be hunting down my family for our antlers?

That's not very nice! And all this after I was a good pimp too!

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:icondarkcrypt:
Hrm.
Most people don't figure that out.
...
Well, this is awkward.
...
If it's any consolation, the antlers are harvested relatively quickly, and the donors are always sedated beforehand. Most are returned home safely.
:iconinsanejudgement:
wouldn't it be easier to just have a moose farm?

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:icondarkcrypt:
You obviously don't know much about ancient canadian voodoo. No, moose antlers are inherently evil, and bring a curse upon any who utilize them. We've thought this all out, and harvesting from unsuspecting descendants is the only way.
:iconinsanejudgement:
but now that you've told me, my decendents will suspect.....

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:icondarkcrypt:
Only if you live long enough to reproduce.
:stab:
:iconinsanejudgement:
but if I don't live long enough to reproduce, you won't have any decendents to hunt....

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